What's the fucking point?
- Mood:
depressed
One, the previously mentioned course selection.
Second, I'm having a hell of a time just trying to get a job for the summer. Most places, it seems, have already done their hiring for the summer or not interested in taking someone for just the summer.
Thirdly, I'm trying to find some kind of semblance of a routine to keep me busy. I've been exercising a lot, which as kept me sane, as well as going through all of my comic book collection to pull things to sell. I keep looking at my collection and thinking "Cripes, I have too many." So, I've already pulled entire runs of things that I just don't really want anymore (Fate, Eclipso, etc) and a small smattering of single issues and a few trades. Also, I'm gonna sell my entire run of trades of both Starman and Grant Morrison's JLA with the intention of buying the omnibus books later this year. I don't know if any of my fellow comic book geeks reading this would be interested, but let me know. I might soon put them up on e-bay.
Anyway, tomorrow, I'm going to get back off my ass and do some productive things. In commemoration of starting to feel better, I present a to-do list for tomorrow:
1) Up early, breakfast (Vector cereal and protein shake).
2) Run on the treadmill for 30 minutes. Try to run 3 miles in the time, if I can (though my cardio has sucked lately).
3) Weight training for about an hour with my new 25 lbs dumbells. Work as much upper body as I can, like arms, shoulders, back, etc, along with push-ups, crunches, etc.
4) Check Job Bank and morning newspaper for job listings. Print off about half a dozen resumes to deliver (including, begrudgingly, Subway).
5) Head out for resume dropping. Bring with me some movies and games to sell at Digital World. Maybe books for Owl's Nest, as well. Leave the comics to sell for another time.
6) Hit Strange Adventures and treat myself to something there.
7) Head home, have lunch (probably tuna sandwich with all sorts of veggies)
8) Pop on the York website and give it another go with course selection (got two picked out so far). I think I'll refrain from 4000 level courses for now and wait until I get my feet back in the water. I also have some credits left over for non-English courses, so I might take something I would be interested in, such as Mythology or Kineseology, if that's possible.
And I'm just not having any luck at all. There's a huge list of 3000 and 4000 level courses and very few, if any, are jumping out at me as courses I'd even be remotely interested in. Not to mention that a good two thirds of them feel like I would be in over my head. Why am I even bothering? I don't feel like I have the brain capacity for any kind of academic work, especially at these kinds of levels. It's the same way I felt about the Literature & Medicine, Theory or even a majority of the Classical Epic courses. I don't feel like I could even "get" these materials. Hell, I've been in and out of school so many times now that subjects or texts that professors might refer to, I've probably already forgotten about.
Why the hell am I going back to school when I can't even get through course selection, despite having so many goddamn choices?! For that matter, how the hell am I going to find any kind of teaching position if I don't have any previous experience working with children? And I don't do teaching, despite what I feel I might actually be good at (and what many others have said, too), what the hell else am I going to do? The only thing I have any remote experience with is customer service and I'm sick to death of upselling crap people don't need.
ARRRGH! Screw it. I'm just going to play Team Fortress 2. I don't know what else to do today.
- Mood:
frustrated
I won't go into details about it here, because it's private, but it was enough for me to reconsider everything with this fantastic girl.
And that's about it. I'm hurting a lot from it right now.
- Mood:
sad
Workers of the TTC went on strike last night, as of 11:30 PM. Apparently, they decided this because last week, when they agreed to give 48 hours notice, workers were abused by the general public (verbal abuse, being spit on, etc) during that 48 hour period. Also, a lot of the workers didn't agree to the deal given to them by the city.
This brings up several things I want to talk about.
Number one, how does the TTC expect any sympathy from the public if they're going to just up and go on strike without any notice? I understand workers receive abuse from some of the general public all the time, so they're worried about their safety. I mean, that's fine. But if I were receiving abuse 48 hours before a strike, I would grit and bear it because the joke will be on them in 48 hours. I don't know all the details of what the TTC are asking for, but from what I understand, they have some pretty high demands. Regardless, yeah, there are people out there that are jerks, who feel spitting on another person because they want a little better working conditions (even just a little more pay) will make them feel better. I work in customer service, so believe me, I know there are some unreasonable people out there. That said, to just shut down services without any notice and leaving thousands, if not tens of thousands, possible hundreds of thousands of people stranded all over the city is not only rude, but unprofessional. I don't know how this kind of action is going to invoke any kind of empathy from the general public.
Which brings me to item number two: how did people feel when they were told at 11:30 PM last night exactly to get off the bus/subway? I would assume that the subway at least stopped at the next station, first, so we're talking 11:31 or so, maybe. Still, Friday night is always a booming place, but there are tons of people who travel a fair ways to go to their party destination. So, imagine you're drunk and about to head home. You wait at the bus stop, only to discover that not only is it not coming, but you need to figure out a way home. Which means the cab companies must have had a sudden surge of business last night.
Honestly, the strike doesn't affect me a great deal. Everything I need is within walking distance, work included. That said, I have a meeting up at York on Monday morning and now will likely need a cab. But a lot of people in the city are now going to have to figure out any mode of transportation. Which brings me to my last point.
Why not take the money you would have spent on the TTC this summer and invest in a bike? It's healthier, good for the environment, and most importantly, sends a clear message to the TTC and the city how displeased you are with this sudden development? Even if the strike only lasts a week, you can still send that clear message. If I wasn't heading home for the summer, I would have done so, myself.
- Mood:
curious
So, behind the cut are two items I want to discuss:
1) The environment, our way of life, the world, etc. Probably the deepest thing I've wanted to discuss in awhile. Please feel free to share your thoughts on this.
2) The CN Tower Climb (pictures included of both myself and Maria)!
( The Environmental Cut? )
- Mood:
accomplished
It's funny how much a month can change. I know very well that I can be an incredibly indecisive person, especially when it comes to big decisions. And I've been fighting back and forth (which anyone can tell if you go through the past month's worth of posts) about staying in the city or moving back home.
Well, it looks like I'm moving back home for the summer. Not for a lack of trying, because a part of me really wanted to stay here for the summer. It would make things easier for a move to, say, York University come September (I did mention I've been accepted, didn't I?). So, in the last two weeks, I started looking for somewhere to stay. Unfortunately, three things got in the way: 1) I can't afford much, working at Blockbuster, 2) A lot of places lists on Craigslist don't accept cats, 3) I'm a stupidly picky person. There was one possibility up near York that I nearly had, until the person told me their other roommate was allergic to cats.
A lot of my reasoning for wanting to stay has been one simple reason: Maria. She has been, without a shadow of a doubt, a godsend. She's caring, funny, laughs at all my jokes (yes, all of them, even the lame ones) and absolutely adorable. I feel like she knows more about me than I her, mainly due to the fact that she has tasked herself to go through a lot of my LJ's archives. That said, the more that I do find out about her, the more I find we have in common. There has been one speed bump in the relationship so far, one that made me honestly reconsider being with her, but we're still talking about it. I won't air it here, because it's something that should remain private (or among a select few of my confidantes). On a side note, while talking with one of my roommates, they said the word "girlfriend" in reference to Maria. I didn't even flinch at the reference, so my roommate said "Oh, so she's your girlfriend now?" I blushed and admitted that yeah, yeah she was. Maria and I spent most of the day together on Saturday, including a lot of support from her with my climb.
Unfortunately, I'm worried, now. I tried finding a new place to stay, but failed. I was suddenly given a shorter span to find one, essentially having to secure one by the weekend, because my boss had to know if he was going to put me on the schedule for the week that runs from the 28th through into May. I had to tell him today that he can't, as I won't have a place to live.
So, for the summer at least, I'm moving home, to Fredericton. I'll be staying with my parents and celebrating my 30th birthday home. On the bright side, I can invite or join along with my fellow geeks to see some of the summer movies coming out. I'm sure someone will want to join me for the opening night of Hellboy: The Golden Army or The Dark Knight. I can have breakfast with my mother on Saturdays again, at least for a few months. I'm sure it won't be hard to land a job somewhere in town (in fact, I've sent out a resume to two places, already). I believe I'll buy a bike that I can use to get into town rather than rely on my parents' vehicles, as well. If luck serves me, I can bring it back with me to Toronto.
But there's still that one nagging feeling: what will this do to Maria and I? I'm worried we'll drift apart and things won't be the same come September. Part of me hopes that maybe either of us can fly up or down to visit each other during the summer. I'm going to miss her fiercely and I'll still fully admit that she is about 85% of the reason I wanted to stay in the city for the summer (the other 15% being a solid job, not having to move back, and maybe a couple of side jobs as an extra in TV or movie). I'm feeling down right now, because I feel like I failed her. I feel like I failed to find a place to live because I'm so goddamn picky and because maybe, even though I still won't admit it, that I really do want to go home for awhile. I had to sit beside her in a restaurant and watch her cry because I was leaving and couldn't join her because I've felt so physically, mentally and emotionally drained over the last few days.
I'm sorry, I didn't expect to have everything gush out like that. I think I should go to bed. Expect the post about the climb tomorrow, sometime (pictures and a video, as well).
- Mood: depressed
BUT, in the meantime, there's this announcement:
http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbcg4ap.ht
Not only is it a true video game for the Homestar Runner crew (officially breaking them away from the website for the first time, something that's long overdue), but it's also being made by one of my favorite game creating companies, Telltale Games! I've been loving the new Sam & Max games since the beginning, so I will definitely be buying these games. It's not just supporting one of my favorite websites, but also supporting my favorite game company.
And just because I feel like adding a little more to this update, a quickie reading review:
-Life of Pie by Yann Martel. I just finished this over the past week and what a fantastic book this was. The description, the imagery, everything about it made it one of those rare "can't put it down" books. The ending and the surprise made me want to read the book over again, but I think I'll wait awhile.
-Bret Hart autobiography. I'm nearly through the first chapter of this hefty book and already I'm loving it. Admittedly, I've skipped ahead a few times to read particular points in Hart's wrestling career for my own curiosity.
-Criminal Vol. 1 and 2 by Ed Brubaker & Sean Phillips. Brubaker is one of those comic book writers who seems impervious to a bad comic these days. A lot of his books in the past five years have been at the top of every comic book fan's pull list. Criminal is no different, as Brubaker returns to his crime noir roots, teams with his previous artist from Sleeper (another of my favorite series) and gives some great street level, gritty realistic crime stories that make Sin City look like a children's book. More, please!
In fact, I'm still a little drunk. I had the following to drink:
-Two pints of beer (one Keith's, one Strongbow)
-Two Goldschlager (sp?) shots (I think that's what did it; Mitchell said it gets people rather drunk)
-A rye & coke before we left.
I believe this might be the drunkest I've ever been, so what better way to celebrate said drunkeness than posting something random on the 'ol LJ! It was an okay time tonight, just hanging out at James Joyce, somewhat discussing with Mitchell what wrestling matches would suit introducing Maria to the idea of pro-wrestling.
How about some quickie drunken thoughts?
-I think my best option is to move back home with my parents and try to earn more money over the summer. It sucks because I honestly want to spent time with Maria more, mostly due to the fact that this feels like the beginning of...something. I don't know what it is yet, but I find the more I get to know her, the more I look forward to seeing her the next time (such as hopefully this Monday).
-I haven't talked about Maria much on here because, well, for one, I didn't know where it was going (and still don't to a point) and two, because she reads this very LJ. That said, she gives me butterflies when I'm near her and my god, I miss that feeling. I think (and hope) it's mutual because she is, without a shadow of a doubt, fantastic. She's artistic (my favorite time spent with her so far has been spent at her place where she showed me all of her artwork...she's an amazing artist), compassionate, funny as all hell with one of the most addictive laughs I've ever met in a person (the kind of laugh where you can't help but start laughing with them if they crack up). I really like this girl and frankly speaking, I absolutely can't wait to see her again. I say this now with alcohol in my blood and I've been saying it to myself since the last time I saw her.
-I can't believe I'm able to type full, sensible sentences so far. I must be sobering up. Though, I've had to backspace a lot more often than usual, I admit, to fix mistakes along the way (for example, I typed loang instead of along just now).
-I'm still not a fan of going out and getting drunk all the time. This is the first time I've even had a drink in months...I think. At the very least, the first time in months since I've gotten even buzzed. I'm worried people are going to lose respect for me as a result of this.
-Yesterday and the day before, I climbed 1,495 steps each day at the gym. Almost there.
Well, that's enough. The typos are getting worse, I'm getting tired, and I have to work in about 9 hours. Good night!
- Mood:
drunk
Please sponsor my CN Tower Climb.
For the next month, I'm going to start my posts with that link. So far, I've raised the minimum $50 (with much thanks to Graham) and another $40 from my sister, Angela. It looks like a couple of my co-workers are also going to sponsor me. Training-wise, I haven't been able to hit the gym as much lately due to work. Yesterday, for example, I worked an 11-hour shift. But, its time and a half due to Good Friday and I volunteered to stay longer (a co-worker wanted to go home early), so I brought it upon myself. But I digress.
The last time I hit the flight of 15 steps at the gym, I managed to climb 1,150 steps. I'm taking fewer breaks in between the sets of ten, as well. I managed to do three sets of ten twice during my climbing without taking a break. That's a huge difference from when I did the 705 steps the first time and had to take several breaks in between.
School
I'd like to make one announcement regarding school: I've decided to go to York. When I wrote the pros and cons in my last entry, I realized that when I compared just the two schools, I realized that York is a much better option for me. It has more opportunity, more selection, etc. Also, there's an option for mature housing on campus. A fully furnished bachelor, with all utilities (excluding cable, 'net, etc) costs about $680, which can be factored into my tuition, so student loans or bursaries might cover that. The only problem is that a bachelor might be too small for Diomedes (and I might feel a little cramped in that, too), so I'm also considering the one-bedroom option instead, which is about another $150 more.
This leads into my final point, and the reason for this LJ update: what to do between May and September, May being the time I need to be out of this apartment and September when I would return to school. I could continue to work at Blockbuster and find somewhere to stay for the summer, live off my pay cheques and save what I could. Or I could move back home with my parents for a short time and get a part-time summer job in Fredericton. The latter is very enticing, to be honest.
However, there's a third option that recently came to my attention that I'm putting some heavy consideration into:
http://www.wwoof.ca/canada/content/start.h
Working and living on an organic farm, probably in the Ontario region. To me, the idea of getting my hands dirty, working on a farm and helping grown natural, organic food sounds exciting. I've learned from moving up to Toronto that I don't really need a whole lot in my life. It would be volunteer work, but room and meals would be covered while working there. So, I would lose any money, per say, but I wouldn't be making any like I might living back with my parents. Plus, there's the Diomedes factor again, as I'm not sure what places might allow pets or if his royal highness would handle that kind of living (mostly my own worry, as he's an indoor cat).
Still, I don't know. The idea is even more enticing than moving back home for the summer. I've always wanted to work on a farm for the experience of it (and also research for The Farmer stories) and it would be something more rewarding than arguing over $5 movies with customers all the time. It'd be manual labor, great exercise, etc. Anyone care to share some thoughts on this idea? I suppose a fourth option would be to move back home and go to one of the farms in New Brunswick, but that feels like it would be redundant if I was just coming back to Ontario, anyway.
- Mood:
contemplative
Regardless of my decision, I think I still want to go back home until September. However, even that might be something to reconsider, especially if I decide to go to York.
( I'll put all this behind a cut, since I'm not entirely sure how long this entry will become. )
- Music:Scissor Sisters - I Can't Decide
-I had four days off in a row this past week, from Sunday to Wednesday, and did next to absolute nothing. I went to the gym a few times and played Half-Life 2 (beating it for about the third time since the game was released years ago). It was kind of nice, but with nowhere to go, I was getting bored rather quickly.
-I heard back from York the other day. I've been accepted into their English program. This makes my decision...difficult. Do I move back home for the summer and come back in September to York? Or do I move back home for good and go to STU? Moving back is still the most viable option, but now I'm not sure which way to go.
-Last night, I went out for a not-coffee with a girl I was meeting through Craigslist. Two hours of really great conversation later and I, ah...would very much like to see her again.
-My best at stair climbing so far has been 920 steps. I've started doing some weight training for my legs, as well, such as two sets of 30 squats with a 60 pound barbell, as well as walking lunges with a pair of ten pound dumbbells.
I managed to make 8 runs of 10 this time, bringing the total up to 905 steps. I took a short break between each one, stretching and getting some water from the fountain, so I'd say that's a big improvement from yesterday. I think yesterday, I might have gone on the precor for a full 30 minutes before, so that might be why I managed to do more today. Tomorrow, I'm taking a break from the exercise and possibly focus on my writing.
Tonight, I watched No Country For Old Men. I just want to say this: it is WELL deserving of Best Picture this year. People complained how the ending was anti-climactic, but they couldn't be any more wrong. If they paid attention, everything wrapped up and everything came back to basically what the title of the movie stood for. Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
As for the rest of my day? Lounging about on my laptop, playing Half-Life 2 and surfing the web. Still got two more days off in a row with nothing to do. Well, we'll see how the writing goes tomorrow. I might bring my laptop to Starbucks, hanker down and work on a few short story ideas I have.
The first day, I did my usual 10 minute cardio warm-up, then an hour of weight-lifting, followed by twenty minutes of cardio on the step master.
The next day, I tried something new. After 30 minutes of cardio on the precor (a striding-style machine, good for leg muscle development), I tried climbing a flight of stairs that's in the gym. It's a set of 15 steps that lead to, honestly, nowhere. Technically, it leads to a costume shop upstairs, but that part is closed off. So, I starting climbing up and down, trying to count the steps. I honestly lost count this day.
Yesterday, I did a 10 minute cardio warm-up again on the precor, followed by about a half hour of climbing the steps. This time, I counted my climb in sets of 10. Admittedly, I had to take a break here and there, but in total, I managed to climb 705 steps. That's not including climbing back down them, but I don't count that since I'm not climbing back DOWN the Tower on April 19th (I hope!). I still need to be able to master 1,776 steps, so it's a start. I'm finding climbing the steps like this, though, to be a better workout that, say, the Step Master machine. My legs were sore as hell, but I'm still going again in a short few minutes.
I've managed to stay successful in eating no junk food. I have a bag of almonds to snack on at work and I've told everyone, both co-workers and roommates to ensure I don't buy any junk. So far, so good.
When I visited the big city last summer, I visited the CN Tower. My very first thought, before anything else, was "Damn, I'd love to scale those stairs, just to say I did it." It's one of those things that, as a Canadian, as someone who has visited and now lived in Toronto, it was one of those landmarks that I wanted to "conquer". If there's one landmark that screams Toronto more than anything else, it's the CN Tower. And you know what? I want to conquer it, as a way to say that while I may not have found rousing success in the big city, I still conquered it.
Well, there's an event coming up on April 19th that I feel would be a fitting bookend on my time spent here in Toronto. So, starting tomorrow, I'm going to start hitting the gym with a particular game plan: preparation. Every day, gym or not, I'm going to do three sets of 20 squats. My cardio time spent at the gym will now be on the stair climbing machine, to prepare my body for this. Also, my diet will now be as little sugar or junk food as I can. I just finished eating a chocolate orange, one last chocolate hurrah before tomorrow.
On top of this, the event is sponsored by WWF Canada (the panda-hugging company, not the wrestling one), focusing specifically on climate change. This is something I strongly believe in, because we only have one Earth and honestly, it's slowly being destroyed. I don't talk about how much I feel about the environment much, but it's I firmly believe in doing what I can to save the environment. The above link is for people to sponsor my climb. I would absolutely love anyone who can to please sponsor, because although I fully admit to joining this for my own reasons, it's still a great cause. Okay, okay, I know, this is starting to sound like "sponsor me!" talk, but one more sales pitch? Any sponsor over $20 is tax deductible. Eh, eh?
Anyway, time to go watch Wrestlemaniac, a horror movie starring Rey Mysterio (senior!). Mitch just said "I think this is gonna hurt", and I bet he's right.
A customer came up to the counter earlier this week with a copy of 30 Days of Night and Eastern Promises.
Me: Ah, so a little Russian mafia and a little Russian vampires?
Customer: Oh, the vampires are Russian?
Me: Yeah, they just charge right at ya.
The more that I reflect on it, though, the more I realize that it's not that bad. Although there's really been very few positive things to note about moving here, there really isn't much negative, either. I gave up a lot of things to be here. And really, that was all it was: things. An old TV that I used since I got my first NES game system, a computer that didn't work half the time and a couch that was a remainder from the break-up with Terrianne years ago. It's a little ironic that one of my favorite books, Fight Club, had one of my favorite quotes that I never even followed: Eventually, the things that you own will own you
I moved up here with nothing but my cat and my comics and with the exception of a wonderful laptop and a few new comics, I would be going back with nothing. So, really, what have I lost moving here? Nothing. What have I gained?
I gained the experience that I don't need what this city has to offer. The big thing that Mitchell said when I was moving up here was "There's so many options here!" And that'd be nice, but I don't really have a need for much that the city has to offer. It's nice to have the option of, say, three comic stores within walking distance, but I don't NEED it. Sure, there's lots of options in the city, if one knows what they're looking for. But I'm not really looking for any of it. Or, well, I don't know what it is that I might want to look for.
Also, this makes my decision about St. Thomas all the easier. I contacted them yesterday and applied. Since it was so soon since the last time that I was last in the school, I won't even have to pay the application fee. I'm seeing it as a sign, considering that I honestly haven't heard back from York, either.
So, I believe I'd like to move home. If at all possible, I might see if I can move back home with my parents, hopefully only until around September. I don't know if Blockbuster would have me back there, but hell, it'd easier than doing the 'ol job hunt again, especially in Fredericton.
I have some more thinking and especially planning to do. Tonight, I'm going to call my parents and talk to them about the whole thing. In the meantime, it's time to go to work.
For the sake of Friends-Lists (at least for people that still use LJ and haven't migrated to the application-heavy Facebook), I'll put this behind an LJ-Cut.
Here's a list of the One-Liner categories, though some points become two or even *gasp!* three lines.
1) Life
2) Health
3) Reading
4) Movies
5) Writing
( Snip! )
- Music:Disturbed - This Moment
Sorry for the bad pun title, but I think my niece, Melinda, would appreciate it.
She's going into surgery tomorrow and she's strong in my thoughts. Her father (my brother in law) and her boyfriend are both shaving, or have already shaved, their heads as a sign of support. Considering that the surgery requires her to also shave her head (or at least a portion of it) for the surgery. As a sign of that same support, I also shaved my head a few days ago.
When I did, I must have dug a little too hard a few times, because I bled and bled considerably. I have a rather nasty cut on the top of my head that, when I bend down to show people, they're reacting with shock and disgust. I think it's appropriate. Showing my support for Melinda is more than just shaving my head. It's about sacrifice. I've shaved my head before, but it was during the warm summer. I've bled before, but not this badly. I sacrifice my head to the cold winter, my blood and my flesh in the hopes that my niece will survive this operation. I bled so that she might bleed less.
The thing is, I don't doubt that she'll make it through. In fact, I know she will. It's not a matter of making it through the surgery, it's just a matter of having it done. She's far too strong willed and honestly, far too stubborn to let some stupid bump on her brain slow her down in life.
I feel like I've fallen out of touch with Melinda over the years. It's not that we don't get along, but much like growing families always do, they drift apart when life leads them in a different direction or different interests. But I still have a lot of funny little memories about her, mostly when she was younger, because while she's grown to be a fine, strong, quick-witted twenty-five year old woman, I still partly see her as the little girl that cried when a circus ringmaster painted Big Bird blue in Follow That Bird. Or guilted her parents into lying to her about Santa Claus ("My parents are always honest with me and would never lie to me about something like that!" and then later, "So, I guess the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy aren't real, either?!").
But my god, she's grown to be a fantastic person. The kind of person who takes life in stride and find humor in most situations. She's the first person to get the joke and laugh the heartiest. In the same category as my very own sister (her mother), Melinda is probably one of the most booksmart AND street smart people I know. She's the kind of person who's smart enough that, just by picking up a book on something, could very quickly be able to tell anything about that subject. She's become a hell of a cook, too, no doubt from working in a restaurant and maybe dating a cook. That sometimes helps. But she picks up on things so quickly. Her wit is, by far, her greatest strength, save only for her heart, integrity and morals. I have absolutely no doubt that when she defeats this tumor, she's going to bounce back as quick as it hit her. She's going to find her way in life, and whatever path she chooses, she's not only going to succeed, but she's going to excel. She's learned a hell of a work ethic from both of her parents and it's because of that, along with every other wonderful thing that they've taught her, that she's going to continue to be an amazing person.
This isn't a eulogy. This is defiance. This is will power. I made a small sacrifice by shaving my head. If I could sacrifice my health, my strength, my heart and my will, I would gladly give it all up if it would help her tomorrow.
It's weird how when I go back to Fredericton, I still consider it "home", where as the place that I currently live is still just "Toronto".
My visit home was...phenomenal. It's kind of odd how I had almost two homecomings within short succession. I returned to City of Heroes and was greeted back with open arms. Unfortunately, I have yet to find a character other than Doug that I enjoy playing as much. The first time I went back on Ventrillo (a voice-chat system for gamers), there was a big greeting of "DOUG!" After my breakdown last week, it was just nice to have that.
In a similar fashion, I felt missed back home, too. I barely talk to my friends back home, honestly, something I can only blame myself for. Still, there were people genuinely happy to see me when they saw me. Hell, even Derek, the owner of Strange Adventures, came to talk to me. He was his usual sarcastic self, saying things like "Well, we didn't throw a party when you left, but we didn't cry, either. So, you know, it was just level."
There was a get together and KJ and Romards, which included hanging out, playing Rock Band (I suck at it, big time) and just overall fun. In a lot of ways, it really felt like the 'ol Table gang was back together. It was just...it was nice. It made me realize how lonely I really was in Toronto.
I know, in particular, my parents enjoyed having me back. My mother, specifically. Though, I fully admit to hugging her more often than I did back home, because I really did miss her and just being home.
I got the chance to also talk with my sister, Judy. She, like everyone else in the family, is worried about her daughter, my niece, who is going into surgery on the 18th for a tumor. Some time before that, I'm going to write a long post about my niece, hopefully to give her a boost before the surgery. Also, like my brother-in-law and my niece's boyfriend, I'm going to shave my head to show my support. Might do that tonight, after work, I'm not sure yet.
So, I'm giving some thought to moving back. I need to get off my ass and call York University to see how the hell I get in. I'm frustrated because it feels so impersonal. All I've had to speak with is recordings or websites. Hell, I don't even know where to even find the damn school or where to go when I even get there. Even if I do get in (which is probably a good chance, since my GPA back at St. Thomas is around 2.8), I'm not even sure if I'll be able to use all of my credit hours from STU, which means I might be set back even further to finishing my English degree. So, I'm considering moving back home and finishing my degree at St. Thomas. I don't know when I would move back, if I did, but it's a thought.
Things are improving with the roommates. At their request, I sent an e-mail with a list of apartment-related things that would keep my stress down, cleaning wise. So far, so good.
Anyway, I need to head off for work. Valentine's Day is tomorrow and of course, I don't have anyone to spend it with. There's an Anti-Valentine's Day thing going at the James Joyce Pub that I might go to tomorrow night. I don't know. Going to a bar by myself like that would just be weird. I have a hard enough time going to a bar with people, since I honestly don't even like the bar scene. Heh, part of me is temtped to ask the co-worker I've had a crush on at work to join me, but I think it's time I bloody well just give up on that.
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thatnickguy- Nick Piers
- Metahuman Press
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